I Wish You Love
Sunday, January 08, 2017
Happy New Year everyone! I'm in Nepal at home with my children. As many of you know this has been a tough time of year for me. I've struggled with what to say, what to write, and what to share here. I have taken the past few weeks to be with my family and as present with my children as possible. I'm hanging in and riding the ups and downs. I struggle every day. I cry every day. I have moments where I find it hard to breathe.
One of my biggest fears through this tragedy was that the sanctity of this home I treasure would lose its joy, laughter, and love. In the height of my grief it was hard to picture a time when I could ever feel joy in our home again. This past week as I watched my little ones playing with their dolls and riding their ripsticks around in circles in the playroom, and blasting music in the kitchen while we cook a family meal, and even combing all the "new year's lice" out, I felt the presence of all those emotions I swore I could never feel again. I take in every bit of love and laughter in this home and hold onto it more than ever. I'm happy to have it back and to be able to see and feel it every day. I'm remembering to breathe sleep, and exercise, sing along on the guitar with my children, crush it at Monopoly, and savor the moments.
Thank you for the love and space you continue to share with me. I am constantly blown away by this community we've created together. Everything we've been able to do is because of you and the way you all give so unconditionally to our work here. These amazing kids are growing and thriving and fulfilling dreams in ways I never imagined.
This week when I was having a tough hard-to-get-out-of-bed moment, I walked over to our school and was welcomed with the biggest hug from this little one. She looked me right in the eyes and said, "You are so nice." It was so simple and yet so genuine. I could see and feel the light in her eyes and the way she looked at me. She didn't need to say anything more. It was somehow just what I needed.
I wish each of you these moments in your own lives this year. I wish you comfort and love, health, and happiness. Thank you for standing by my side and carrying me throughout the year.